Jun 2006
- Jun 3
- portents
What is the most likely explanation is that the only thing I've had to eat (at least since 11 a.m.) is practically pure unadulterated sugar. Never underestimate the fact that sugar is actually quite a potent psychotropic agent.
· Read more… - Jun 4
- deconstruction and democracy
Yes, I agree, it’s a little too facile to connect the stance of eminent intentionality with fascism, but I look at eminent intentionality as the antithesis of deconstruction, the bread and butter of post-modernist and post-colonial literary criticism.
· Read more… - Jun 5
- forgiveness is not forgetting
I was inspired by this meditation on racism, which describes the well known evils of over-generalization.
· Read more… - Jun 5
- intuition ain’t all it’s cracked up to be
I wonder if maybe the main reason why guys don’t listen to their sixth sense is the fact that most of the time it tells us completely freaky stuff over which we have no control over.
· Read more… - Jun 5
- less portentious than that
OK, I didn’t mean to make my last post sound ominous. Maybe it’s because tomorrow is June 6. (You know, 6/6/06. I don’t think the Devil really gives a damn about the vagaries of the Julian and Gregorian calendars, so it probably doesn’t have any significance to him, although it may very well have significance to some Satanist or nihilistic terrorists a la Columbine.)
· Read more… - Jun 8
- the quest for water
I have developed the habit of coming home from work and making a beeline to my bed. I seem to be running out of gas much too early these days.
· Read more… - Jun 9
- never had a dream come true
Yes, I realize that this is the title of a cheesy pop song by S Club 7, of which I have disgracefully written about quite a few times before.
· Read more… - Jun 9
- magic/imagination
I’m too lazy to look it up, but I can’t help but feel that there is some cognate root shared by these two words.
· Read more… - Jun 11
- meditation on inadequacy
I find it interesting that my mind is unable to remodel the emotional trajectory of my life through at least the last 10-15 years. I remember being someone who was a perfectionist, inordinably hard on myself, always thinking that I was a failure, that I wasn’t good enough, that I wasn’t smart enough, that I’d never succeed. I recognize that a lot of this was in response to a mother who was excruciatingly demanding, who couldn’t stand things being done in any other way than her own, and who would just do things for me instead letting me do things my own way.
· Read more… - Jun 12
- utang na loob
I always forget whether it’s na or ng. I have this propensity for tacking on unnecessary -ng enclitics and eliding necessary ones. My cousins in the Philippines always find my mangled Tagalog highly entertaining.
· Read more… - Jun 12
- giggles
- Jun 13
- sunset over the sea
This was one of those days that I wish I could bottle up and save for when times get bad. With my iPod as my personal soundtrack, I felt unstoppable. There were moments of such heartbreaking beauty that I felt that I could die.
· Read more… - Jun 21
- summertime
The sun stands still for the longest day of the year, and I can’t help but pause and reflect. There are less than 90 days before I turn 30, and for the first time in my life, I feel like I need a long-term plan.
· Read more… - Jun 23
- purpose (portentiousness on a friday night)
Now my philosophical and spiritual beliefs have been very murky these past years, ever since I found myself entangled within a crisis of faith. On one extreme, I do often feel that we live in an uncaring universe, on an ill-regarded planet, orbiting an unremarkable sun. We are victims of chance, the end results of a trillion, trillion, trillion dice rolls, random points along the lines that form the trajectory of the quadrillion, quadrillion particles spewed out from the Big Bang.
· Read more… - Jun 24
- simple pleasures, small magics
Before work today, one of my chief residents was on one of the alternative music stations in town, which was bizarre and very cool. She won an hour to guest DJ and she broadcast her own playlist.
· Read more… - Jun 24
- songs for another journey on my own
I immediately hearken to “10:15 Saturday Night” by The Cure, although I’ve long stopped waiting for the telephone to ring. It seems that that long, dark tea-time of the soul hits me long before Sunday, and it’s kind of sad that I’ve forgotten how to enjoy a weekend on my own.
· Read more… - Jun 27
- one perfect sunrise
The irony is that I am always looking for the sun precisely where it is not.
· Read more… - Jun 28
- last words for a long, hard day
Oh. so. tired.
· Read more…