I learned a valuable lesson from a fallen priest back in high school. At the time, I didn’t know his crimes, and the lesson loses no value because of them. (He was eventually accused and proven to have molested several children.)

But the lesson was this: it is almost human nature to thing about things using false dichotomies. But just when you think there are only two choices, a moment of discerning clarity will reveal to you that there is always another choice.

He was giving a homily at mass I think, or maybe just lecturing in A.P. English class. He deconstructed the movie “Dead Poet’s Society” and the protagonist’s false dichotomy in the middle of the movie: stand up to his father and follow his heart, or commit suicide. Unable to do the former, he does the latter.

While it would suck the drama out of the movie (and ruin the plot completely), anyone who is not depressed can see that there are alternatives. There’s no reason why every flash point in life needs to be some bloody Battle of Maldon, or some suicide death pact like the Battle of Masada.

(In fact, the sitcom “Friends” even lampoons the premise:

I thought that movie was so incredibly… boring. I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can’t be in the play? What was that?! It’s like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. I walked out of there and I thought, “Now, that’s two hours of my life that I’m never getting back.” And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.

True, there are plenty of battles where it would be immoral not to fight, but even then, there is always more than one way to face the enemy with honor.

In keeping with my “I want to live” epiphany, I recognize that there is a third way I can live a fulfilling life. If happiness with my soul mate is not my fate, I’m not necessarily condemned to a pointless life of loneliness and pain. And this doesn’t mean I’m going to Meet Someone®, someplace, someday.

This means fulfillment now. <p>Carpe diem</p> and all that jazz. Go on vacation somewhere, get some sunlight, write that novel I’ve been alway meaning to get to. Just chill out and go with flow, and let life take me whereever I need to go. <p>Gæð a wyrd swa hio scel</p> .