tags: oblivion

2000

July

2000 Jul 21
Ludicrously Sunny Morning

I feel so subnormal. Abnormal I could handle, but this is a realization that I am not fit to live this life, that I cannot fight, don't even wish to fight, and I'm just waiting for oblivion to swallow my head. More melodramatic bullshit. I don't feel like I can handle a crisis right now. I'm not strong enough to rebuild the walls, not deal with people. Goddamn, why can't I deal with people? This is easily the source of all my problems. I get all achy, shivery, dying. What do I do with people?

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2006

May

2006 May 27
mine, and mine alone

In this tired hour
of spent beer cans
and cigarette butts
the chewed ragged ends of
hoping for some sort of change
waiting for the winds
to turn aside the drifting course of the clouds
for the sun to shine forth

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August

2006 Aug 3
perdido

the lost one
wandering down the shadowed path
2 days since I’d seen the sun
panic, and then
peace

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2008

January

2008 Jan 31
night

The roar of traffic, the murmur and thrum of the crowd
and the mournful winter wind, scouring the desert sand
and the inside of my soul is silent and still
like a raging river flash-frozen in mid-torrent
and eons have passed, the axis of the earth precesses, and still there is no thaw.

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