tags: bullshit

2000

July

2000 Jul 18

Self-Deception

…I know this deception well, writing (scratching, really) onto decaying matter, dead sinews of a tree, thinking I am capturing some pure essence of life, not just me, but all around me. I do nothing but observe, I, the weaver of these many threads of lives, otherwise unsung. I am breath of Life, immortality. I give voice. I represent.

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2000 Jul 21

Ludicrously Sunny Morning

I feel so subnormal. Abnormal I could handle, but this is a realization that I am not fit to live this life, that I cannot fight, don't even wish to fight, and I'm just waiting for oblivion to swallow my head. More melodramatic bullshit. I don't feel like I can handle a crisis right now. I'm not strong enough to rebuild the walls, not deal with people. Goddamn, why can't I deal with people? This is easily the source of all my problems. I get all achy, shivery, dying. What do I do with people?

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2012

January

2012 Jan 31

random thoughts while walking aimlessly through target

I don't really know where it comes from. I just know it's from somewhere external. I did not learn it. I was informed of it. Probably some sort of romantic—or even Romantic—garbage that I came across in high school, about how you can look into someone's soul just by looking into their eyes. How you can identify intelligence by recognizing a spark.

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