wanting starlight
sunlight
sunrise
gold glimmer
warmth
you make me think of home
and a deep longing buried within the frozen chambers of my heart
thaws
like darkness arising
monstrous awakening
madness stirring
save me
faerie princess
enchantment
I am spellbound
lost in your glamour
I am in your power—
do you even know?
with a snap of your fingers
with a flick of your wrist
you could destroy me
or make me into
something great
a hero, a king
wishing
your bidding
my love
dancing into May—
maybe something good
maybe something bad
—in the moment of that conditional
that decision
so infinitesimal
a butterfly in Molucca
rainstorms in Topeka
a single teardrop falls
how do you lose something
you never had?
mourn something
never meant to be?
your heartbeat
life
breathing
I am alive when I think of you
not giving rise to this hope
so brittle, so frail
knowing that if it breaks
one more time
someday
I won’t be able to pick up all the pieces
leaving the detritus of my soul
to be scattered by the uncaring wind
to love you
tempting fate
daring the universe
to crush me
implode
less than nothing
even light couldn’t escape
Know—
if I were a braver man
who could love freely
purely
unconditionally
(though I do love, for who you are,
whether I am, or never was)
—know that I would love you
you would be my life
I would be bound to you
heart and soul
in defiance of all the laws and limits of nature
Still, I dare
every little thing has a purpose
a photon
a wavelet
in the right place at the right time
igniting the heart of a star