Maybe I have a problem. I like to joke that no one really leaves Berkeley without a substance problem.

This is the first time I have been injured after getting horrifically drunk. (Somehow I managed to avoid giving homage to the porcelain god.)

One, there is a 2.5 cm diameter ugly purple bruise on my right bicep. Two, I think I may have broken my left thumb. There is a huge bruise over the thenar muscles and there is also brusing on the dorsal side, and I can’t hyperextend at the MCP without terrible, incapacitating pain.

It’s probably just badly sprained (although I’m of course being a hypochondriac and wonder if I didn’t lacerate the radial artery somehow—at least it’s not a snuffbox injury)

I should just get a splint.

Instead, I’m probably just going to wait a year or two when it doesn’t heal and all my hand muscles have atrophied.

At least I can still type.

What I’m not so sure is if I can still play guitar.

Anyway, the thing that is a little scary is that I don’t remember how I sustained these injuries. Sure, there was this unexplicable urge to go running up the hill, and most likely I fell and slammed my hand on the concrete, but the etiology of the bruise over my bicep escapes me.